You people who live in places with mild seasons, clean air, and bike lanes where you don't have to die? I. Hate. Everyone.
Yesterday, driving in from the park after my bike ride, I was less than three miles from the central business district, but the buildings were even more obscured than in this picture. That's just wrong. And it inspired this rant about other things that are wrong and should not be tolerated under any circumstances. Add you own in the comments.
- Any music mix in the men's locker room that includes Whitney Houston and Josh Groban. Look, it doesn't have to be death metal 24/7 , but come on. Whitney? That's just wrong.
- Seen at the Woodlands Athletic Center Pool last weekend: man in his 50s, bald on top with hair around the edges of his head cropped to less than 1/4 inch--but with a thick sweater of long hair all over the rest of his body. That's just wrong.
- Real men should not fuss about the hair on their head. That's why it was so fundamentally wrong for John Edwards to spend $400 on a haircut. In my opinion (given the amount of hair I don't have) blow dryers in a men's locker room are out of place. But, blow drying the hair on one's body?!!! Blow drying back hair and nether hair???!!!! That's.Just.WRONG.
- Hey, guys--you guys at the neighborhood pool with the 30+ BMI--those tribal tattoos and barbed wire around what used to be a bicep when you were in college? Not a good look for you any more. Either mix in some salads or invest in laser tattoo removal. Otherwise? It's just wrong.
- Hey, gals--you gals at the neighborhood pool with the 30+ BMI--that belly button ring that looked so sexy when you were in college? Not.So.Much. Rings in rolls are not sexy. They're just wrong.