Friday, November 03, 2006

Mistress Arlene


She is cruel to be kind--Mistress Arlene.

Don't worry. She's not that kind of mistress. She's not THAT kind of mistress either.
Mistress Arlene is the world's most knowledgable and skilled therapeutic massage therapist who works at the greatest health club on the planet. I have just given her the dominatrix nom de plume because she has (at times) seemed to take great pleasure in making me wimper, moan and cry like a school girl while she fixes my broken body. The first time she worked on me, before the race, she actually thanked me for letting her "kick my ass." That was not some girly spa massage with lilac scented oil, Taconite Boy.
Mistress Arlene can't be more than 25 years old nor more than 5'2", but she has every therapeutic massage tool known to man in her bag of tricks and she has power to burn. Not only that, she knows exactly which tool to pull out to achieve the best result for each unique client's problem.
On Tuesday she basically restored the use of my right shoulder and arm. My condition was so painful that even light Swedish techniques caused me to break into a cold sweat, lose my breath, and draw back from the touch. She did not give up or freak out. For more than an hour, she worked on the neck, back and shoulder until they could stand increased pressure, deep tissue, active release therapy, stretching, and range of motion excercises. Thursday, I went back for more deep tissue and ART sports massage techniques, and she spent another hour working on improving my function.
I am so lucky to have access to skilled people like Arlene and the Intergalactic Chiros. Who is it that helps you with your owies--whether physical or emotional? Be sure and thank them today.

5 comments:

Iron Pol said...

While not one for chiropractors (painful childhood memories), my personal physician is a doctor of osteopathy. His skills at manipulating the skeletal structure helped resolve what I thought was severely pulled muscles in my leg.

It was actually a pelvic torsion, and he bent me back into shape. Two minutes of OMT fixed the problem.

Hopefully, this gets everything back in order, for you.

Danielle said...

I *heart* my massage therapist! If I wasn't a broke grad student, I would go to her every week, but alas I can only schedule my torture sessions occasionally... I hope Arlene et al. can cure what ails ya!

KyleKaboom said...

I wish we could all have our own mistress live in with us. Like they say in Going Long, you have to recover like a champion to perform like a champion. I'm thinking Mistress A could be that champion. Or any mistress for that matter. ;) Enjoy the beatings.

Allez said...

I love massages! The investment is well worth it!

Pixie said...

I have a massage therapy school down the road from me and have found a really good therapist. She is amazing. It hurts so good. ;)