Saturday, June 23, 2007

I See Thin People

The average body mass index of Lubbock, Texas had dropped dramatically this weekend. For, this is the weekend that the abnormally thin, freakin' fast, Ironskull triathlete crowd comes to town for Ironman 70.3, Buffalo Springs Lake Triathlon.

Oh, and I'm here to along with many fellow bloggers like Kona Shelley and Triboomer.

Sers'ly, if you've never been to an Ironman branded race with Kona slots on the line, you don't know what it's like. This is not your local sprint or Oly or even half. Everywhere you look is a muscled up, lean body on a six foot frame wearing a wetsuit or toting a space shuttle bike and a pointy helment. You see things like this:

and this:

and this:

and this:

Oh, and this:


and this:
(She's kind of a big deal. So I'm told. )

We saw Andrea Fisher all rocked up with her long, broad shouldered swimmer chick physique. I am telling you, a woman like that could break a little hobbit like me in half. I don't care who you are, that's just hawt.

Last year, I did my second ever triathlon here and was COMPLETELY intimidated. This year, now that I know I can do the distance, I have the utmost respect for the course, but I just resign myself to the fact that those rock stars are doing a different race than I am. I mean, yeah, I'll be on the same course with Andrea Fischer, Desiree Ficker, Natasha Badmann, Tim DeBoom and Simon Lessing, . . . . you get the picture. I'm not doing the same race that they are.

Pretty much the same with the me and the elite age groupers. They are still as intimidating, but they're going to do their thing and I'm going to do mine. I'm racing me and father time. Father time will eventually catch me, but he'll be clutching his chest and wheezing when he does.

So in preparation for race day, Triboomer, Kona Shelley and I went out to the course for a little warmup swim.

We followed this with a prep bike and run checkup.

I am pleased to report , in a completely unbiased endorsement, that my new 2XU wetsuit, which I purchased with my own jack, is BEEEEYOUUUUUTIMOUS. It is understandably a little tight across the Trigreyhound's massive chest and latimus dorsai, but it's like swimming with a freaking life jacket on. Uber-bouyant. Much better than my crappy old wetsuit. Really helps the confidence and relaxation in the water. I am go for launch to have my most comfortable swim ever, whether or not it is what one would call fast.

After a bit of a swim and a bit of a bike we checked out the run course:

(Uhm, that's me up the road there a bit, droppin' the hammer on Kona Gurl)

The run has some of the wicked hills that dive in and out of the canyon at miles four, five, eight and nine.
(Well, isn't that special)

In the heat of the Texas sun after 3+ hours of work in the water and on the bike, these are truly special.

After the prep work, we went to eat and I got what I thought would be a little bowl of red beans and rice and a baked potato. What I received was enough carbohydrate energy to power the Eastern Seaboard in the form of a potato the size of Rush Limbaugh's head. These potatos have obviously been doping. Trigreyhound just hopes he is not the subject of a random drug test tomorrow.

(Rush is smaller than this potato)

As I was sitting there looking at the excessive food, I was reminded what makes the U.S. great. I spied two native Lubbockians, probably husband and wife, each at least 300 pounds, waiting for a table at the IHOP and passing a cigarette back and forth. Ah, . . . **sniff** . . . that's America. Sharing the love.

Finally, in a side note for the betting public, my Canadian challenger's wave has been moved. Instead of starting 20 minutes ahead of me, she starts five minutes behind. This means we will have more immediate feedback on who is "winning" the challenge she laid down to the dawg. She will undoubtedly pass and drop me in the swim, I will perhaps see her on the out-and-backs on the bike, and I will then have to catch her and put 5 minutes back into her on the run.

Can I do this? I have my doubts given the predicted heat tomorrow. But then, that's why they hold the races.


Wendy said...

Great post Hound Dog!

(That potato may actually be more intimidating than the pros!)

Best of luck tomorrow to all of you. Have fun out there!

GeekGirl said...

Hey, man, where are you?? A bunch of us are eating at Orlandos at 6:30. Maybe you can stop by and say Hi.

GeekGirl said...

PS: I'm writing you from Lubbuck, Dawg. if I don't see you, good luck tomorrow! I'm doing the sprint, all the rest of us are doing the 70.3

Lance Notstrong said...

Is that Kona Shelley our neighbor from the North sporting a Texas flag suit? Nice :-)

Curly Su said...


Lisa - Slow & Steady said...

Have fun!!

Iron Benny said...

If you race IMCDA '08, I promise, you will not regret it. This place is incredible. We have had an awesome trip so far, and the race hasn't even started yet. if there is any race that can bring me out of "retirement", it's IMCDA '08. But, even if I don't race next year, Nytro and I will be here. We have already decided that we are coming weather I race or not. It is that awesome here.

Duane said...

Good luck and enjoy!

Fe-lady said...

They were smoking in a restaurant? Well...I guess it's Texas after all.
Hey, I have an outfit like that first picture! GO TRISPORTS! (But no pointy helmet- and I have a little more boobage, and my neck is 53 years old...otherwise we could be TWINS!)
Gosh...every blogger in the country is racing tomorrow somewhere, but me. I will sit back a watch and cruise the internet for results....ahhh!
Best of LUCK!!!! (Smile out there!)

SkiRough said...

That's not a potatoe, it's a cheesesteak sub... right? right?!?!

With fuel like that, I predict you will slay the course! Go get em Hound! :)

Nytro said...

good luck t-dawg. hope everything goes according to plan for everyone racing tomorrow!

No Wetsuit Girl... overseas! said...

When you're running, your heart is pounding, your breath is burning your lungs, and you're digging deep staring at a Canadian's back and trying to shove 5 minutes down her throat - just remember, you're representing AMERICA! That should get you moving. We're counting on you!

PS Some of those pros look like they need a hopped-up potato too!

Bigun said...

doesn't sound like you are taking this cnallenge SERIOUSLY enough - who's gonnna kick that forigner's ass today? I CANT HEAR YOU!!!!

Jane said...

You forgot to include hottie pics of yourself! I'm sure you all will do well.

Bigun said...

you went after her on the first loop of the run, didn't you? Great job, and great race - it was fun "watching" you on Ironman Live!

Wendy said...

Great job out there Greyhound!!!

the Dread Pirate Rackham said...



Just sayin.

a.maria said...

yeah ok. that potato is larger than my head.

GeekGirl said...

A bunch of us tried to get into the lake to check out the scene, but some super witch wanted us to pay money. She ignored our bracelets and told us we had to pay. B1#@H.