Friday, August 04, 2006

All You Need is . . .

"All you neeed ees . . (pause) . . . kettel bell . . . (smirk)"

That is what MIKI said near the end of our session. Sweat was dripping from every pore, I was drenched as thoroughly as if I had been dumped in a pond, and every muscle in my body was trembling. In fact, if there are typos in this post, blame it on the convulsions in my delts, pecs, biceps, hips, core, back, quads, ass, and pretty much everywhere except my metatarsals.

A kettel bell is the medieval torture device pictured above. It is manufactured still by the Chinese communists, and apparently is useful for training olympic athletes or tormenting political prisoners. It was the featured item for our circuit workout this morning.

I arrived early, did a little aerobic work to raise my core temperature and stretched before MIKI arrived. When he got there I proudly announced that I had warmed up and stretched. "Eees gooot. (shrug). Vee do special warmup. I'll get my toyssss . . (pause) . . . und vee begin."

The "special" warmup was a dumbell-enhanced core routine that might have been devised if Mark Verstegen had been fond of hurting small, furry animals. After 15, sweat popping minutes of that, the workout began.

MIKI broke out the cattle bells and proceeded to break out a circuit workout calculated to humble the proud and crumble the humble. Multimovement strength and power exercises involving arms, legs, back, core, chest . . . dang near everything else. Three sets. The first set was hard. The second was a lactic acid-dropping burn fest. The third . . . I have no clear memory of the third set.

Apprently, this was followed by an ab routine and some coach-assisted stretching. At least that is what I'm told. Someone may have to tell me about Greyhound 2.0--citius, altius, fortius. I may not live to see it.

8 comments:

Flatman said...

I am going to love following this. Did you take your "before" pictures yet??? :)

TTUTri said...

Dude, you have to get some audio of this guy...

21st Century Mom said...

That all sounds painful but it also sounds very cool. You know that old saw about what doesn't kill us makes us stronger, right?

Does he wear a black hood? I thnk you're okay until that happens at which point you need to run... run....

Iron Pol said...

Why, oh why, do we volunteer for this stuff? Perhaps there's a growth market here. Triathlete Psychiatry.

Bolder said...

MIKI

da.

Habeela said...

You may not be present for the introduction but I'm sure you will revive somewhere between Greyhound 2.0 and 3.2.

the Dread Pirate Rackham said...

Ohhh, I feel your pain - but for different reasons (today's blog). But hey - remember - you PAID the guy to do this to you. I love it!

And hopefully this too will get easier, right?

TriBoomer said...

"Nex vee meet Hanz and Franz. No girlymen allowedt."